Every year we get sold the dream that this Christmas will be “the best ever” and inevitably we are left disappointed. This “best ever Christmas” usually involves spending too much money, eating too much sugar, consuming too much alcohol and spending too much time with people we avoid for the rest of the year – for a reason!

This year – for the sake of the children and our sanity – let’s do things differently, shall we?

1. Decide on what kind of Christmas you want – a fun filled day of laughter and games? A quiet contemplative chill-out whilst the kids enjoy their presents? A gastronomic delight with friends? Or a family trip to visit the grandparents – then home in time for doctor who?

2. Prepare your children in advance. Let them choose aspects of Christmas that mean a lot to them – for my kids it’s Advent Calendars and a stocking in their room on Christmas morning. For many it is going to a carol service on Christmas Eve or leaving out mince pies and carrots for Santa and Rudolph. Whatever you decide, remember to enjoy the ritual and embrace the joy it brings. Inevitably it is these simple repeated rituals that mean the most to us as we grow and which form the basis of our Christmas memories. Personally, I am partial to a Baileys and a mince pie whilst madly wrapping gifts on Christmas Eve.


3. If you are expecting guests over, invite them to chip in with the meal preparation, guide them as to appropriate gift giving so that your children are not swamped and if you have a ‘separated family’ try to make sure there is no ‘gift rivalry’ between parents/step parents. Now is the time for communication and cooperation.

4. Once the kids break up from school they inevitably fall out of the regular routines – eating more junk food and staying up later, especially when visiting over the holiday season. If this is what happens with your children, remember to cut them some slack on their attitude and behaviour – make some leeway for meltdowns and tantrums if they are over tired and high on sugar. And please – don’t take it personally when they ultimately prefer some other person’s plastic gift to your carefully chosen, beautifully wrapped gift. Seriously – it isn’t personal! Kids just have little to no empathy around gifting. They like what they like.

5. Remember, this is your Christmas too – so ask for what you want. A bubble bath for a whole hour uninterrupted? A walk in the woods? Make it happen. After all – you deserve it!